Small Break

Well, I am taking a small break from blogging for 2 reasons.

#1: I need it for some mental sanity. I need to take care of myself for a bit. My emotions are a little out of control right now.
#2: To get ready for my Etsy shop opening.

So, I will come back here around February 8th, but until then, keep me in your prayers as I try to take care of myself. See, my kids deserve a happy and healthy mommy;)

More.....

I have helped 3 friends make aprons. I forgot to take pictures of all of them, but I remembered with 1 of them;)
This is the reversible apron she made for her mother-in-law.


What do you think, super cute!?! My friend is soooooo photogenic and I am obviously not!


We also made matching mother-daughter aprons. They are wearing the opposites so you can see both sides!

I also have some good news! I am in the process of opening a Therapeutic Crafting etsy shop! YEAH!
I will be selling aprons, decor, baby items, one pattern I made up, and lots of other fun things! CAN'T WAIT!!!! I will be having a grand opening February 8th. With fun surprises for the 1st 10 customers! Spread the word!

New Years Goal

I usually don't make New Years resolutions, but I made one tonight......25 days late. I am going to organize my house, the WHOLE thing. Back yard, garage, kitchen, bedrooms, storage room, craft room, bathroom. Yep, that's my goal. I believe it will be slow going, but it has be done because I am going crazy with all the clutter. The constant mess really wears on me and I get depressed a lot easier. It's hard for me to clean when I feel so overwhelmed, so I don't do anything and it gets worse.
I keep my house fairly clean, but my closest and cupboards are surprisingly messy.
So, here is a small step towards my New Years goal. Joann's has their storage bins 40-50% off. I went to buy some fabric and came out with these 2 little beauties. I do so much sewing and this will go a long way to keeping my home organized.
I put all my bobbins in here with a few other things I use while I am sewing.


A SaWeet thread organizer!


I put them in a little nook on my sewing cabinet.


Then I close the door and no one knows they are hiding;)

NOW OPEN!!!!

YES! Hobby Lobby is NOW OPEN!!!!!!!! The grand opening is February 1st. They don't have all of their inventory out yet, but most of it is out. I AM SOOOOOOO excited! I had my eye on a pear there and guess what!?! It was 50% off. So of course I bought it! It's all part of my grand ideas for my kitchen! I am still working on it, but I will be sure to show you soon!

Isn't it beautiful!

Antartica

My father in law got the opportunity for the 2nd time to visit Antarctica for 3 weeks! Here are 2 of his shots.

King quartet


Graduated chicks

Make and Mingle

Love is in the air! I wanted a simple Valentine's Day decor for this months activity. AND I found one. I had people vote on which one they like best and this was the winner. So. ladies, let's get painting.
Make sure to sign up and pre-pay. There is a sign up and envelope in the binder.

Cost: $6 per set

Everything is included, just remember to wear cloths that you won't mind if they get paint on them:)

***Note the change in Date and Time. I wanted you to be able to enjoy your craft BEFORE the holiday was over***

DATE: February 6th
TIME: 10:0 AM
Place: My casa, Greater Phoenix Area (everyone is welcome to come. Email me if you want too;)

Even if you are not making the blocks, you can still come and socialize!

Late Night Building

Monday night, my hubby and I put together some kitchen chairs. Once, a few months ago, my sister sat down on the left chair and fell onto the tile floor. The legs broke right off. The next day, I sat on the right chair and slid my tail bone right onto the leg. Luckily for me, the 3 legs stayed on and my tail bone caught all my body weight on the 1 leg that broke (so lucky). I couldn't sit for about a week.


At Christmas time a lot of companies were doing free shipping. I found a seller on Amazon who sold these beauties to me for $25 each! So I bought 4. YEAH! The only downer was the directions were horrible and we put the legs on backwards. The chairs were leaning forward. We sat for a little bit and wondered what was wrong, then I figured it out. We had to take the legs off and turn them around. It was a pain in the ........ Well, it was not good.


I finally hung up these candle things I got at a garage sale. It took me FOREVER to get around to it. I know most of you follow my blog because of my photography skills:) but I must say, I had a hard time getting the flash not to reflect off the picture.


I needed a place for the kids to hang up their dress up cloths. I found these hooks at Hobby Lobby.


So far we have 3: Fireman, Cowboy, and Police officer (that is a vest and doesn't hang up). I have a surprise coming of a 80% off tree skirt I turned into a dress up outfit for my little man.

Bottery Barn Knock Off

I saw these at Pottery Barn for $149. I think something like this would be perfect in my bathroom.


I bought these 2 mirrors at a garage sale.


I painted them heirloom white then sanded it a little to give it an aged look. I already had the paint, so this cost me $1 to make both of them. I saved $148. YEAH! (yes those are my glorious hands in the mirror.)


Here they are in all their glory. My father in law took the photo in between the mirrors. He is a really amazing photographer. We have a few of his pictures hanging up around the house. I will give you a tour sometime.

Sneak Peak at Kitchen

This is what I have been up to this week. I am starting to decorate above my kitchen cupboards.
Two 12X12 photos of my kiddos on stands from Real Deals.


Some candles...


I forgot to take before shots! DRAT! These were a funky pink pattern. I got the boxes on sale at Home Goods. I took them home and spray painted them cream and black. I got the "No. 505" off Graphic Fairy.


I still need to figure out what else I am going to put up there, then I will do my big reveal. For now, you can just anxiously await my grand reveal!

Button Bracelet

I made a button bracelet for my friend. She had a jar full of really cool vintage buttons. I asked her if I could take some and make a bracelet for her. She was really excited. I layered and sewed the buttons onto a piece of elastic. (If you are going to make one, use elastic thread when sewing on the buttons)

Here is what I came up with:

Guest Blogger

Hey hey! I just wanted to let you know I am over at Licking Lollipops today! Go check me out. Also, without further ado, I give you Emily!!!!!!!

Hello Therapeutic Craft Readers!! My name is Emily and you can find me over at Licking Lollipops! I'm a 24 year old graduate student, wife, sister, daughter and crafter. I'm currently gettingmy masters degree in Counseling and I've also struggled with depression since 2004 after I attempted suicide trying to deal with my depression. Depression can be such a scary and disheartening condition. Every thing that Brenda has said is true. If you think you might be stuggling with depression I urge you to ask for help. Ask for help from anyone, your loved ones, your friends, your doctor and most importantly a counselor of some kind. I am also very open about my story with depression and how I've dealt with it in the past and the presence, so if you have any questions for me, please visit me and feel free to ask anything.

Now on to what I have for you today. In my bathroom, I have all my necklaces on one of those ugly accordion holder thingys.



It's done it's job but now I want something that looks better than that. So I came up with this:



So what you need is a frame of some sort, (I got mine at a thrift store and painted it blue, I love re-purposing things) spray paint if you need to paint your frame, some nails or a staple gun and some sort of metal sheet wire (I used chicken wire that I got from my Dad last time I went home).



What you do first is spray paint your frame if you need to. You could buy one that you already like, but I just like to spray paint things. Plus that frame was $2.



After you spray paint your frame, you could distress it if you wanted it. Distressed furniture and things like that don't really fit in with anything that I own, so I just liked the glossy finish of the spray paint. You could also put a glaze on it too if you didn't like the finish of the spray paint.

Once your frame is finished, cut your wire about 1/3 to 1/2 in bigger than the opening on the back of your frame.



Once your wire is cut, press it into your frame. You cut it a little bit bigger so that it will stay in your frame.



You might have to bend the wire to fit in there since it's bigger, but this will cause the wire to stay in with little help. The raw edges of my wire was pretty sharp, so I tried to stick that into the wood so it would stay in there. After you get the wire how you like it, use your staple gun/hammer a few nails in where your wire doesn't want to stay. After that you should be done!

Hang your jewelery on it and you have a pretty place to display and store your pretties!

Here is just a sneak peak at some of the things you can find over at my place.





I hope you've enjoyed this little tutorial and I hope you come and visit me at Licking Lollipops! It's been great being here today!

Personal blog

I posted this on my private family blog 7-25-09. I thought a few of you might like to see how far I have come;)

I have found a lot of relief from writing about my thoughts as I morn for the inevitable lose of my mother. It is the one way I find I can come to terms with everything. I decided to share some of my thoughts today.

Fight For Your Life
by: Brenbren

I feel like punching a wall right now. I crave the distraction the pain in my hand would give me, relief from this awful HELL that is my reality. The pain is welling up inside of me. I am ballooning with emotions, confusion, grief, anger, intense anger, and a sense of loss. I feel like I have just been consigned to a life of zero choices. I get no say in all of this. My opinion holds no weight in the deciding factor. Does it matter that I am only 25, that I have children yet to be born, to still have baptisms, graduations, marriages, and mission farewells to attend? NO. I feel like she is giving up, like it’s not worth trying anymore. In a morbid sense I understand what that might feel like, but it’s her duty as a mother, as a grandmother to fight. It’s her duty to do everything, EVERYTHING that she can to stay longer. She shouldn’t have the only say in this. This isn’t just her fight; it’s our fight too. We’re heavily invested in this nightmarish reality. Does our wants, our needs, hold no value? It is her choice. Why would she want to live a life of constant sickness? It’s no life; it’s less than a life. Where can I turn for peace?
My mother won't be doing more treatment. CT Scans show no significant change in her cancer. Only 1, ONE, lump out of twenty-FREAKING-five lumps changed and even then it was so minuet it’s no even worth mentioning. 3 treatments of life altering chemo and NOTHING!!!!! 3 treatments of waste of time, and no more. 3 treatments, 3 weeks, 20 days, 480 hours, 28,800 minutes, 1,728,000 seconds of the constant poison dripping into her veins. It all led to nothing, NOTHING!!!!!!! There is nothing left. There is no second chance. She is too sick to want to continue for NOTHING. She lost all her hair, lost too much weight, vomited and then dry heaved, blood drawn, surgeries, Hickman line, too weak to even speak, let alone go to the ER, to weak to lift her head off the pillow. Her hair fell out by the handful. I cut the rest off because she asked me too. It was less hair than my son’s 1st hair cut. She was bald. I had to stop, put the scissors down because my tears blurred my vision. I didn’t want to hurt her already tender and fragile head. It was too painful to cut of the last of her hair. This helpless creature before me was ½ of the mother she use to be. She was wonder woman. She could do anything, make everything better, she could sew her way out of….. well, a really hard place to sew your way out of. Her fingers dance across the piano. I knitted a hat to cover her head. The 1st one was too small. It fit my nephew’s head; he’s only 17 months. The second fit. She says it keeps her head warm. She is cold all the time. We made a blanket together once, to snuggle and feel close to each other. She says it’s not warm enough. Her frail body can’t keep heat in. You want to know what if feels like to see your mother slipping away before your eyes? It feels like reality stopped. My whole body is on fire, my mind is in total chaos, my heart feels like it is ripped apart, shredded, it hurts, it hurts, it hurts. I want her to fight. I want her to keep going. How do you ask someone to keep wasting his or her life on something that isn’t working? “Hey mom, please keep making yourself SO sick that it takes you 3 weeks to recover and by the time you finally feel like getting dressed, start the treatment all over again.” I feel like a hypocrite. I want my mom to fight, but I want her to suffer!?????! Does that seem right? No, I don’t want her to suffer. I just want her here with me. I want her to be at my side when I give birth to my 3rd baby. I want her to be there when I finally graduate with my bachelors, I want her to be at my children’s blessings, baptisms, graduations, weddings, and mission farewells. I want to spend summer nights swinging on the back porch, listening to the crickets’ chirp and the sprinklers constant rhythm. The people I want next to me are my mom and my sisters. We will giggle about the cute things our kids did that day, the funny things sisters say to each other, and reminisce about our childhood. That is was I imagine eternity to be, a reminder of the good moments I was allowed to spend with the most amazing woman I know. I feel truly grateful to be her daughter, to have her help, her love, and her support. Without her, there will be a hole. No person can fill her shoes. She is my mother to which I owe my very life too.

June 13, 2009
Last night I felt agitated and angry. I went to the Diamond Back’s game. It was boring. I don’t enjoy watching baseball, but the atmosphere was great. I didn’t want to go. I wanted to silently suffer in my pit of despair. I did not want to face people. I did not want to admit I needed help. I did not want to admit that I could not find my way through the abyss. That would mean I am weak and incapable.
I woke up today feeling better, but gradually the reality of the chaos in our home wore on me. Everywhere you look there is junk pilling up. Our cupboards are unorganized, our counters are covered, even our ugly couch is covered in laundry waiting to be folded. It is too overwhelming to know where to even begin. I feel immobilized by the magnitude of the project. We are living in a 2-bedroom apartment. Our 1 year old sleeps in our bathroom in a pack-n-play. There is junk shoved into every inch of space. It is suffocating me. There is no peace, there is just stuff. The only ‘Zen’ I have is found within the sweet protecting walls of oblivion. The place I can go to when my eyes are closed and reality slips away. It is a place where sleep gently enfolds my mind into dreams of a new life, a life devoid of clutter. It is the place where my constant rhythmic breathing gently rocks my troubles away. This ‘dream’ life is where no matter where you look, you don’t see the stark reality of a life in total chaos. I can’t take total chaos any more. The war zone inside of my mind and heart is spilling out into reality. There are times I can’t control the rage within, times when I want to lash out at anything around me. Oh, what I would give to punch a wall, throw a lamp, or chop up my couch. I could use it to heat my home. It’s a really ugly couch that my husband insists we keep. He says we don’t need a new one. I hate it, I resent him for making me keep it. He acts like I should enjoy it. Our son put gum on it and it won’t come out. I flipped the cushions to hide it, but then he put gum on that side too. I hate that couch. Every time I see it I want to take a saw to it. I can’t stand to look at it. It is just a reminder of all that I wish were different in my life. It’s just a waste of space, precious, precious space. With only 1144 square feet, ever inch is worth fighting for. I think I am going to throw it out while he is gone. When he comes home, I will just tell him it was stolen! He won’t be mad, at least not long.

7-4-09
After I had my daughter, I had severe postpartum depression. I began having suicidal thoughts. My doctor told me I could start running again (even though I was 2 weeks postpartum) He said it was better to be alive and running, then dead. So, I started running and I lost weight fairly quickly. I had my last 10 lbs to go when turmoil struck my life. My mom was diagnosed with terminal cancer. I went and saw her here and there. While dealing with this stress, I turned to food to ease my pain. I gained ALL of the weight back. I stopped running too because I had gotten out of the habit of exercising.
I got some counseling for dealing with the inevitable lose of my mother. I struggled and floundered around with this for a few months. In total desperation, I could see no way out. I had sunk as far as I could go. I have depression, my mom is dieing, my husband is gone all of the time for residency, I feel like a single mom, I am overwhelmed beyond belief.
The weight became too much to bear. My already depressed state of mind was on over load after finding out the chemo treatments were no longer helping. The doctors have decided to forgo further treatments.
I prayed so hard one night; I laid all of it out. I cried harder then I ever have and I didn't feel the peace I was seeking. I feel asleep discouraged and filled with despair. I wondered why does God want me to wade through this? Where is the peace I so desperately need? Where do I Turn for Peace? Where is my balm of Gilead?
The next morning I felt a little better, but not what I had hoped. I opened my email and low and behold there is this invite from Hillary about FG8. I thought what the heck, I will give it a try.
I have still been pretending ALL of the original things were included in this challenge. I began studying my scriptures on a regular basis because until recently it was sporadic. (No judging here people, sometimes scripture study takes a back burner we all have our ups and downs.) There was no noticeable change in the peace I have been craving. I still felt burdened beyond belief, but it was not too heavy all the time now. I didn't feel crippled by my sorrow.
I started exercising again and started feeling better. I even noticed my food choices were affecting my mood too. I felt better about myself, which goes a long way in being a better mother and wife. We were having regular family home evening with the kids and Dave and I started doing scripture study together.
A few weeks into the program, I was doing some personal scripture studying and a feeling that I have never had before, overwhelmed me. Basically, I just knew that I was more beautiful then many people because I was righteous and my father in heaven allowed me to see that. I really feel like I received that blessing because I was having regular study. I still have weight to loose, but I am not worried about it anymore. I don't obsess about it. Basically, FG8 helped me through some of the process of mourning my lose, but it also helped me find balance in my life. It helped give me the extra push to make scripture study more regular in my life. I developed a closer relationship with my father in heaven and began to find peace.
I was not at all perfect in it, but as I sit at my computer typing this, tears stream down my cheeks because I have re-read this and seen the Lord's hand in my life. Though I didn't find immediate relief from my sorrow and grief, I have seen a 'process' of changes that have led me to a more balanced and comfortable state of mind. I am not sure whether you realized the impact a simple program had on my life. It wasn't about being healthy (although that did help) It was more of the process I needed to go through to allow my Heavenly Father into my life to help me find the direction to peace.
I am not done with this nightmare, but I have hope and assurance that my mom will watch over me in the life here after and she will see everything I want her to be apart of, just in spirit instead of body;)
Prayers are answered, just not always they way we think. Mine came in the form of an invite to FG8.

I caught the last 15 minutes of Dr. Phil the other day and he was talking about addictions. It was addictions to things like shopping, eating, and work.
Dr. Phil asked everyone the same question, "What are you running from?"
It turned out, it was lack of confidence. The addict was trying to hid from the pain of repulsion they felt about themselves.
I began thinking about myself and how I don't deal with stresses in my life. I run from them. I either ignore them or eat. I am repulsed by my physical appearance because my body has changed so dramatically after giving birth to 2 children. I don't understand how my spouse could be attracted to it, especially when I KNOW what I really look like. I stay home most of the time because I don't want people to see me like this, but that makes me feel worse. I feel like people don't like me and I don't have friends. I feel like I am not a likable person. Which, as you can see, is a cycle of never ending unworthiness.
I wondered, "How does one build self confidence? How do I stop worrying about my flaws?"
I really had no idea how to fix it. So, I asked my very wise and understanding husband. I was hoping for some amazing solution that would be a quick fix and I would suddenly morph into this happy person who loved herself and felt comfortable in the skin I am in. YEAH RIGHT!?!?!
He told me I had to control my thoughts. That if a bad and degrading thought entered my head, I had to make a plan of how to IMMEDIATELY get it out. I decided to sing really loudly (in my head, so no one else hears it) a song I made up. It's all about me!

Oh, you're so beautiful, you have pretty blue eyes and a great smile. It's so white and straight. You have the firmest butt anyone has ever felt (which seriously, I do, it is a gift really). You have a giving heart and a friendly personality. Go girl you ROCK!!!!

This is day one of my new mind make over. I have sung that song a million times already and it's only 9:30 AM . Seriously, I am seeing a problem here. I never noticed how often I put myself down. It is usually just a small, "I wish my stomach was flatter." type of thought, but it still hurts. I am going to start counting how many times I sing it. That way I can see how I sang it less and less as time went on.
WAHOO!!!!!

Nook Completed

I FINALLY got around doing a painting for my nook. It seriously took 3 minutes. I am mulling it over to see if I want to add something more to it. For now, it is finished.

It is so different depending on which direction you put it.


Hubby and I like it this direction best, but it doesn't look good this direction in the nook. Oh well!


I used glass candle sticks with chocolate candles. I added some ribbon to the candles because I think it needed a little extra bling!


You probably remember these branches from THIS post.


All together, it looks like this!

Button Button Who's Got My Button

I have been taking a sewing course from Sun valley Quilts (where I purchased my machine). Hanging on the wall is the most unique quilt I have ever seen. The more I look at it, the more I like it.
Seriously people, check it out in real life. The photo does not do it justice. Go to:
Sun Valley Quilts

9857 West Bell Road
Sun City, AZ‎
(623) 972-2091‎

This particular piece is called, "Button Button Who's Got My Button"


It is a piece of art. It intrigues me and makes me want to keep looking. I wish the photo was better because there are so many different fibers, textures, colors, patterns, and stitches. She uses material that doesn't normally go on quilts. There are earrings, beads, Angelina fiber film, needle felting, and much more.
I decided I wanted to make one and hang it in my house, just using different colors because the colors here are not my taste.
The woman who makes these quilts, Betty Hahn, teaches a class too! Sad news! The class is on Sundays. DRAT! I emailed her to see if she would consider doing a class on a different day, so here's hoping she will! FINGERS CROSSED!

Reality Check

I read a post on The Mommy Files the other day about a blogger who had committed suicide. I had never heard about this woman until I heard about her death, but I felt connected to her in so many ways. Seeing the wake of sorrow left behind, made me take a step back.
I have been very open with my battle with depression, but I want people to better understand the despair and inability to find a way out. I want people to be able to better understand what one experiences with this disease. How it could lead to thoughts of suicide or eventually the lose of a life.
With depression, life seems to freeze in time, like you will feel this way forever or it will just keep coming back. Hopeless, comes to mind, but it feels like you are totally out of control inside with no way to release the turmoil deep within your soul. Something inside is fighting, clawing, screaming, crying, raging, but there is nothing you can do to calm it. It is over powering, overwhelming, and all consuming. It feels like the very jaws of Hell are opened wide ready to consume you. Darkness, lost, frightening, anxiety, panic, rage.
Imagine loosing someone close to you, your lover, your best friend, your parent, your child. The person a depressed person has lost is themselves. I am not sure how to truly explain what it feels like, but I hope my willingness to share has encouraged, uplifted, explained, and educated all those who have read my story.
My whole heart goes to this woman's family at this time. My prayers are with them.

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My favorite part of blogging has been connecting with other creative people and developing friendships. I LOVE featuring blogs. I would love to have YOU featured on Therapeutic Crafting. Here's what I'm looking for:

• An original tutorial. Something creative that you are passionate about.
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If you have a project and would like to share it here, fill out the form below.  I will schedule you and I will also do a spotlight on your blog! I love to spotlight people and introduce them to my readers.

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