Flair up

I have Spina Bifida. It has been a big set back from time to time, but usually, I am active and pain free. Well, I guess I was due for a flair up because boy did I have one today.
I was walking and thought, "man my back is hurting a little." Seconds later I was in so much pain I couldn't move. I was stuck laying on the cold tile floor. I think I spent about 30-45 minutes there. It got pretty cold and hard.
Luckily, my 4 year old brought me my cell phone. I called around and had 2 friends who literally saved me. One friend came over very quickly and found my pain pills. While I laid on the tile floor (waiting for the painkillers to kick in) she took care of my kids, made me as comfortable as possible, and chatted with me. As soon as the pain had subsided enough for me to crawl to the couch, I did. I wasn't able to put any weight on my left leg for a long time, but I am doing much better. I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO grateful for strong pain killers.
My other friend brought me lunch and cleaned my house. She also took my son to her house for a few hours, until my hubby could get off of work.
THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU! to my 2 dear friends who were not on holiday and could help me off the floor;)

Also, my friend told me that some people where wondering why I have depression. Especially because they feel I am so talented. Funny question that is, especially from someone who doesn't understand or has never experienced depression. I would like to explain depression. I am NOT depressed because I think I am worthless or because I think negatively. Those who know me, know I am a very cheerful and upbeat person. That is not a facade. That is who I am when I am not depressed.
My depression started after I had my daughter. I got severe post partum depression. I was put on medication for it. When hubby graduated, our insurance changed and my psychologist didn't accept our new insurance. Long story short, my medicine ran out. I went off my anti-depressant cold turkey (that is a big no no with this type of medicine). I got really sick, went through withdraw and rebounded hard core. It was during the rebound, that I attempted suicide.
I have a hormonal/chemical imbalance. It is no different a disease than someone with diabetes or allergies. It is a medical problem that I have to take medication to treat. I wish all I had to do was think happy thoughts and I would be better, but it is not so simple.
My body doesn't balance itself out on its own. I have to have medication to replace the chemicals in my brain that non-depressed people's bodies automatically make. So, if you learn nothing else, it is a medical problem that I have absolutely no control over. My path was complicated by insurance which made my depression worse. BUT, I am treating it and pushing on and that is was really matters. Many may not understand my story, but that is why I openly share it. I want to create an awareness and better understanding of what depression really is. It is a disease, a malfunction in a person's body. It is not a disease that is visible to the naked eye, but still debilitating non the less.